Why you should see Fogelfoot tonight rather than Van Halen

Fogelfoot, as an organization, is a great fan of Van Halen. After all, it was of Fogelfoot that the seminal California hard rock band wrote the lyric “Have you seen junior’s grades?”

But Fogelfoot’s is the sound you should spend your money on tonight at Skinny’s NoHo, and here’s why:

1. Ticket price. At $5 a pop, you could enjoy the exquisite Fogelfoot show (as well as the talents of The Lebarons, Valmont, Shotgun Sugar, and Deltanaut) and still have at least a hundred bucks left over for Skinny’s generous Midnight Happy Hour drinks. What does five bucks get you at a Van Halen concert? Bus fare to the Staples Center.
2. Youth. As you well know, Fogelfoot is all about the teens. With a combined age of 191, how can Van Halen speak to your youthful needs? “I like how the line goes up the back of the stocking,” says David Lee Roth. Fogelfoot fans don’t even wear undergarments.
3. Sea birds. Does Van Halen have a song about a cormorant? No.
4. Chemistry. The members of Fogelfoot don’t hate each other, even secretly.
5. Logistics. Van Halen isn’t even playing tonight, anyway.

We hope to see you: You’ll get some leg tonight for sure!

See also: Skinny’s NoHo

Fogelfoot would rock all 7 billion faces if given the opportunity to see them

LOS ANGELES—Responding to United Nation estimates that the world population has surpassed 7 billion, Fogelfoot today announced plans to rock them.

“Perhaps even rock the shit out of them,” Fogelfoot added. “If the venue has appropriate drainage.”

Since Bon Jovi’s 1990 song “Dead Or Alive,” in which Mr. Jovi reported that he had “seen a million faces, and [had] rocked them all,” the world population has grown by 2 billion.

And according to Fogelfoot, auto-hailed as America’s Alternate History Band, its appeal as an aggregator, synthesizer, innovater, and regurgitator of popular song trends casts a wider net than the band from New Jersey.

“Bon Jovi had better hold on to what they got,” Fogelfoot said, “because we are going to rock the faces of 6,999,999,000 more people than they.”

Fogelfoot, which recently played for an audience numbered “in the high 30s” in Sherman Oaks, California, estimates it will reach the 7 Billion Faces Rocked goal by 2317.

“By that point we expect the population to have stabilized back to a Book of Genesis-friendly 37,” Fogelfoot said, “so we’ll probably find some place in New Sherman Oaks for the show, outside the Sentient Bacteria Zone.”

Skinny’s Lounge: October 17

Fogelfoot is playing more gigs in the exotic San Fernando Valley, which is just fine by us. Life is simpler there, parking is plentiful, drinks are less expensive, and audiences are only 96 percent comprised of entertainment industry personnel.

Voted “Best Place to Chill Over the Hill,” (I’m assuming this is due to its laid-back vibe rather than the number of retirees), Skinny’s is a great club.

Fogelfoot will be performing around 10 p.m., and other bands on the lineup include Blaise Smith, Sheri Pedigo, and Alaina Blair with Bill Alexander.

Join your friends as you walk through the San Fernando Valley of the Shadow of FOGELFOOT. Performing their contagious, disturbing, whimsical, and often poignant brand of Satan/songwriter fare, FOGELFOOT will enchant you even as you quaff Skinny’s strong beverages.

Skinny’s Lounge
4923 Lankershim Boulevard
North Hollywood, CA

Primal Fogelfoot

Brian and Marty will be performing the next few Fogelfoot dates as a duo, due to some amicable artistic and personnel changes. Recent duo performances have been raucous yet intimate affairs, as something changes in an audience when it is confronted with the majesty of Fogelfoot unbound by the noisy discipline of a rhythm section.

Fogelfoot will play a Japan benefit on April 23, will return as the house band for Sexy Tales & Other Intimate Acts on April 26, and gets its French on at Taix on May 12. Continue reading